DIANE SIMPSON
Diane Simpson is one of the most entertaining and informative speakers you will ever hear.
A handwriting expert and Profiler, she is funny, original and, as they say, something completely different.She advises big business on executive recruitment and has worked on high profile crime investigations including the infamous Yorkshire Ripper.
She has appeared on more than 100 television and radio programmes and as well as being one of P and O’s most esteemed lecturers, she is a member of the Chartered Institute of Bankers Exclusive Speaker Panel.
After dinner presentations, luncheons, medical conferences, seminars, training sessions and informal gatherings...Diane offers a range of talks appropriately tailored to her audience.
Often described as a cross between Jo Brand and Shirley Valentine, her humour is dry and witty; her anecdotes are first-hand and amazing and her hilarious, but non-invasive audience participation is a well established norm.
She is a member of the British Institute of Graphologists; The Graphology Society; Victim Support; Friends of Broadmoor; Appeal Council of the Psychiatry Research Trust; Chartered Institute of Bankers Speaker Panel and Mensa.
Her books include: "Graphology with Diane Simpson"; "The Analysis of Handwriting" and "Your Handwriting and You". She also writes the hugely popular Graphology column in Marketing magazine. She is also an expert in the use of fonts ( a fontologist).
TALKS
Luncheons, Dinners and Corporate Events
OHP = Overhead Projector * = Entire audience participates
SUBJECTS
1. *'GRAPHOLOGY OR KIDOLOGY?' An introduction to a fascinating subject and the opportunity for every member of the audience to take a look at what their own writing reveals...all worst fears being confirmed in the process! An intriguing and 'fun' experience [OHP essential]
2. 'I NEARLY DIED!' From lecturing to a room full of convicted psychopaths, much too close encounters with media stars and mediation in terrifying hostage situations - a wealth of hair-raising, fascinating, utterly hilarious and entirely true anecdotes gleaned from Diane's media and professional life [OHP optional)
3. *'RIGHT BRAIN? LEFT BRAIN?' An amazing lecture during which every member of the audience builds up an accurate profile of their natural strengths and weaknesses. Hilarious antics plus inspiring revelations ..falling off chairs is optional! [OHP essential]
4. *'OODLES OF DOODLES' Every member of the audience fills out a doodle sheet ..and then discovers just how much they have revealed about EVERY aspect of their lives! [OHP optional]
5. *'FORTUNE TELLING, CLAIRVOYANCE & MIND READING - FACT OR FANTASY???' An absolute mind boggling demonstration of all three ..followed by an eye-opening exploration of how it can be done ...by ANYONE. [OHP or Flip chart essential)
6. *' WHAT' S IN A SIGNATURE?' Every member of the audience is confronted with what lies hidden in their signature. Many fascinating and well known Signatures are used to illustrate this funny and highly revealing presentation [OHP essential]
7. *'THE CRIMINAL TENDENCIES REVEALED IN YOUR WRITING!' The ultimate opportunity to confirm all your worst fears and suspicions [OHP essential]
8. 'THE TRUTH ABOUT STRESS'. A humorous and highly revealing presentation designed to help the audience turn stress into motivation by using some fascinating techniques. Some intriguing give-aways for every member of the audience . OHP essential.
9. * 'A WOMAN'S LOT IS NOT A HAPPY ONE' Despite its title, this is an hilarious talk designed for the all-female audience. Begins by making the best offer they have had all day and ends by confirming all their worst fears about themselves. Fascinating giveaways. OHP optional.
10. 'YOUR CHOICE?' A lecture tailor-made to suit your requirements. Simply fill in a confidential form and leave the rest to Diane.
11. 'JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?' (Entertainment for an entire morning, afternoon or evening). Hours of unsurpassable insights and humour as the audience are taken on a leisurely stroll through the landscapes of their own minds - with some fascinating and unforgettable detours including doodles, mind games and signatures. Punctuated by laughter and gasps of surprise as each member of the audience gets to know the most fascinating person in the room - THEMSELVES. Self-knowledge certificates awarded to survivors OHP essential.
COMMENTS
HUDDERSFIELD NHS TRUST - Nov 1999. "We all enyoyed your interactive session tremendously and many of us have learned new skills as well as a lot about each other. Your humour and demeanour enlightened the whole process. You provided a significant contribution to what was a very successful two day event - one of the best in our 11 year history. I thank you very much for that."
GLAXOWELLCOME - "What can I say?! Your presentations were wonderful. The team haven't stopped talking about you. Chris could not believe the accuracy of your analysis of his handwriting - in fact he would like you to analyse his management team's handwriting."
CANCER RESEARCH CAMPAIGN - " Your talk was such a great success with our members that I now face the challenge of finding a speaker to come anywhere near the high standard you have set".
THE CLUB Abu Dhabi - "The response from the ladies has been resounding. Without exception, the numerous comments that we have received are most complimentary and it would appear that Diane managed to provide something for everyone and succeeded in delivering a very interesting and equally hilarious presentation. I believe the ladies were pleasantly surprised that she is an authority on the subject and not just a funny person"
THE WOOLWICH - . Thank you for a very informative presentation enjoyed by everyone".
MBA PUBLISHING - "Well, what can I say Yours was a very hard act to follow and I felt so sorry for all the other speakers! Can you come and do it again next year?"
NATIONWIDE - "On behalf of myself and the rest of the committee who organised the above conference, I am writing to thank you for your excellent presentation which everyone found interesting and entertaining"
WOMEN'S ENTERPRISE NETWORK - "On behalf of myself and the members of WEN, I would like to thank you most sincerely for your brilliant presentation last Wednesday. I received numerous telephone calls the following day, they were taking a few moments of their time simply to voice their gratitude for a thoroughly entertaining and informative evening".
CHARTERED INSTITUTE OF BANKERS - "A brief note to formally thank you very much for your entertaining and thoroughly enjoyable address. Everyone I have spoken to has said how much they enjoyed the evening and particularly your presentation which was both different and I suspect revealing! Seriously, it was a huge relief for me as President to be able to rely upon someone who can speak so well and with such professionalism to ensure that the key part of the evening was enjoyed by so many people".
BUPA - " Our Head of Strategic Implementation, has asked me to say a big 'thank you' to you for your most, entertaining and enjoyable after dinner speech.We all found it most enlightening and amusing.
BUSINESS CLUB - " Excellent. That's the only word to describe your presentation to the club last week. No - that's a lie. Other words include: interactive, funny,enjoyable, highly entertaining, and more besides, but that will do for now. Thank you very much - it was superb!
DIANE ON DIANE.....
This is what people can expect when I get to my feet......
"Essentially I am an expert in my own field [personality profiling] and [I am told] a first class 'storyteller' .....real life stories I hasten to add! You see, my work regularly takes me into situations that most people never have the opportunity to experience ......things seem to ' happen' to and around me-often in a very alarming way e.g. a shoot out on an airline in a remote part of the Gulf to a seduction attempt [HA!] from a well-known media star, to being required to give a lecture to 25 psychopaths [I kid you not!] in an institution for the criminally insane ........in many cases the only thing that stops me bursting into tears is my [rather bizarre] sense of humour that enables me to see the funny side of what is happening around me. My anecdotes are all first hand. I name names without hesitation (and the names I name love it, so that's all right!].
Of course, when I give a talk I take pains to assess the mood and style the organisers want to create, and, above all, I assess the audience and their expectations [both ahead of time via the questionnaire and 'on the spot']. All of my presentations can be 'reworked' to fit in with the occasion. I like making people laugh, I enjoy bringing people into my world and letting them share my feelings and experiences. Because most people want to test my abilities as an analyst I have amassed a number of 'hands on' psychological 'games' that can be indulged in en masse. In o vast or poorly proportioned room an OHP may not be viable so I have a variety of things that the audience can 'do' which merely require them to have access to something to write with (I' ll provide the paper) etc. As a 'story teller' my facial expressions play an important part in proceedings - so, like most professional speakers, I particularly dislike talking with a vast space [e.g. a dance floor] between me and the audience. I recently did an after dinner at the NEC where [to my horror] there was an entire ballroom floor between the 500 strong audience and me .....it was my immense relief when I discovered that there were cameras trained on me that relayed my head and shoulders onto gigantic screens on either side of the stage .....it felt like the Oscar Award Ceremony!
The key words pertaining to all of my presentations are FASCINATION and HUMOUR. I have often been described as a cross between Jo Brand and Shirley Valentine .... .....I do not drink. I do not swear. I am never crude. I am never abusive. I am punctual.
NAME: DIANE SIMPSON
PROFESSION:[25 years] Personality Profiler (Graphologist/Fontologist)
Has conducted extensive research into the application of the analysis of reading/writing [handwriting and typefaces] as a means of determining, assessing and influencing personality/responses.
MEMBERSHIPS:
Member- The British Institute of Graphologist (Founder Member)
Member - The Graphology Society
Member - Victim Support [Support group for victims of crime]
Member - The Speaker Panel of the Chartered Institute of Bankers
Member- Friends of Broadmoor’
Member- The Appeal Council of the Psychiatry Research Trust
Member- Mensa
BOOKS/WRITING:
‘Graphology with Diane Simpson’published by EP (now A&C Black)
‘The Analysis of Handwriting ‘published by A&C Black
‘Your Handwriting and You ‘published by The Royal Mail
Writes the hugely popular Graphology column in ‘Marketing’ magazine
TV & RADIO:
Participated in more than 100 TV and Radio programmes for BBC TV 1 & 2, BBC Scotland, BBC Wales, BBC SELECT, Anglia, Granada, TVS, Central, Thames, LWT, HTV, Tyne Tees, SKY, YTV, Radios 1,2,4 & 5, Canadian Broadcasting, Hong Kong Broadcasting, Qatar Television. Latvian TV, Overseas Forces Broadcasting [Gibraltar) etc.
Appearances include:- [BBC 1] -
Lifelines, Wogan, Open Air, Going Live, Look North, Russell Harty Show. [BBC 2] - Starsigns, The Book Programme. [ITV] - TV-AM, Vanessa, What’s My Line. [Talk Radio) - Lorraine Kelly. [Radio 1] - Janice Long. [Radio 2] - John Dunn. [Radio 4) - Today, Stop The Week, Womans Hour, You & Yours etc.
LECTURES:
Experience ranges widely ...from membership of the Chartered Institute of Bankers exclusive Speaker Panel, contributing to Loughborough University’s high profile ‘Risk & Hazard Management’ diploma Course and sailing the seven seas lecturing to passengers aboard some of the worlds most luxurious cruise liners. Diane has lectured in many countries including such diverse areas such as Finland, Dubai and Hong Kong.